We all want our children to grown up and become model citizens. Is there any way to ensure that your child will become a good person? The truth is that any sort of guarantee is a pipe dream, but there are certain time-tested methods that at the very least will put your kids off on the right foot. it is my belief that kids are naturally good and that all negative behavior is a result of said behavior being rewarded.
Helping your child become a good person is a simple matter of encouraging positive behavior while disrupting and disavowing the negative actions they might take. While children are naturally good, they also learn quickly. If a certain form of manipulation (like tantrums) give the desired response, they won't hesitate to repeat it at any given opportunity. Understanding this relationship is key to shaping it properly.
Be The Role Model
As if it really needed to be stated, your children will take most of their cues from your example. If you are a good person then they are almost guaranteed to follow in your steps and emulate what they see. Be a good person even when they aren't watching, because news will reach them one way or the other.
Treat Them Kindly
The second tip to ensure your child grows up to be a good person folds pretty neatly into the first. Children who experience harsh words or malicious actions are going to repeat those actions towards others. If you are kind to your children even in their worst moments the point that they need to be good people will be driven home that much quicker.
While treating your kids kindly is extremely important, that doesn't mean that you allow them to run amok and do whatever they please. Children crave boundaries as long as they are enforced consistently. You can direct your child to a time-out without being cruel. Once the time is over, get on their level and have them tell them what they did wrong and what they'd do differently next time. Have them apologize, tell them that you still love them. In my experience, this leads to very emotional moments that strengthen the parent-child bond.
Teaching responsibility will help your child in becoming a good person because without being responsible for something they can't possibly understand the consequences for abdicating their duties. Don't overwhelm a child with chores, but give them one or two tasks that they consistently need to tend to and enforce consequences if those duties aren't completed. When they do enter the workforce, this lesson will pay dividends.
Parents are always shocked when my kids call them sir or ma'am. I might be old-school, but it seems like this should be the standard. At the very least they should be saying please and thank you. A little respect goes a long way in the real world. You'll be far more inclined to provide whatever is asked of you if the person asking is affording you some modicum of respect while asking.
Sharing Is Caring
A big part of manners is sharing what you have willingly. That doesn't mean roll over and hand over whatever you have when it's asked for. If it's a coveted toy, teach your child how to reason it out and offer to take turns with the one that is requesting it. If it's food that's easily split then they should do so. If the requester oversteps their bounds then encourage your child to stand up for themselves and withdraw the offer.
Thank you is just a word. Actual thankfulness is shown through the attitude of gratitude. If your child is given a cool new toy and says 'thank you' but still treats it like trash, you'll know immediately whether or not gratitude is being shown or not. Gratitude and appreciation are extremely important in helping ensure your child is a good person.
Another trait of good people is empathy. The ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes is absolutely invaluable. Assist your child in considering why someone might've been less than cordial. A lady at the grocery store was extremely rude and I asked my daughter why she thought that might've been. She theorized maybe the woman was in a rush. Humanize others as much as possible, no matter how they choose to treat you.
Praise Good Deeds
In the above example I praised my daughter for viewing the rude lady as a person. She didn't write her off and say 'she's just mean'. Whenever I catch my children exhibiting positive attributes I'll point it out and tell them how much I appreciate that. This kind of positive reinforcement goes a long way in helping children become good people.
Don't Always Reward
The last point I'd like to make is that there doesn't always need to be a tangible reward when your child does the right thing. This can quickly devolve into doing the right thing simply for the reward and if there isn't a reward? Well, the true colors will show through pretty quickly.
Now that your child's attitude is as sweet as can be, make sure that their feet smell equally sweet with our grape scented foot deodorizer powder. You can also try the bubblegum scented foot deodorizer powder if that's more pleasing to you and your child. I'd also suggest checking out our blog on 10 dangerous TikTok challenges to keep your little one safe.